The Pink Ribbon Effect

Just a 32 yo new yorker living in a #pinkribbonstateofmind

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The Pink Ribbon Effect
August 9, 2017August 9, 2017

We have to have hope

July 11, 2017July 11, 2017

Career Musings from a Cancer Survivor

May 21, 2017July 11, 2017

A penny for my thoughts?

April 23, 2017May 10, 2017

The Woman who gave me Hope

April 19, 2017April 19, 2017

The importance of grabbing a seat at the table

April 2, 2017April 3, 2017

In the eye of the (chemo)storm – my Chemo Diary

March 27, 2017

The Joy of Standing Still

March 5, 2017March 5, 2017

What’s in my Chemo Bag?

February 26, 2017February 27, 2017
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The Art of Receiving

February 23, 2017February 27, 2017

Say this, Not That

February 3, 2017February 27, 2017

Behind the scenes of #Chemoday

February 2, 2017February 27, 2017

The mirror that cancer holds up

January 27, 2017February 27, 2017

Do me just one favor……

January 11, 2017February 27, 2017

Journey to the C-Word

January 2, 2017February 27, 2017
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“Broken crayons still color”

December 20, 2016July 25, 2017

Triple the Positivity?

December 12, 2016February 27, 2017

My first battle scar

December 9, 2016February 27, 2017
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Nothing prepares you

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Recent Posts

  • We have to have hope
  • Career Musings from a Cancer Survivor
  • A penny for my thoughts?
  • The Woman who gave me Hope
  • The importance of grabbing a seat at the table

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Instagram - The Pink Ribbon Effect

I felt inspired by my breasties @anns.binnans and @jenhods for their #whatyouCANTsee posts so +1 more. I started this account because I wanted to spread kindness, knowledge share and help other young fighters feel less alone. But social media is a double edged sword. It's natural to compare your experiences with the often carefully curated online lives of others or to get sucked into the black hole of insta scrolling. I'm guilty of it for sure. I know people will look at this photo without reading the caption and form their own opinion/story. I'm probably part of their daily hour on IG. Same goes for in person. Countless "wow, I had no idea you had cancer" or "you look the same!" 〰〰〰〰I'm laughing in this photo because I was having a really fun day. But what you can't see are the scars my beautiful @yumikim romper hides. The pushed aside constant achiness of bending my knees or sitting down too long. The radiation burns. A mediport that often hurts when bumped into but is the on ramp highway my chemo and targeted drugs flow(ed) through. The headache my wig gives me. The numbness in my hands. The dark circles from anxiety and insomnia filled nights. The worry and unbelievable hardship of trying to fit back in. These are the realities of a cancer survivor. It's important to support and be kind to one another but it's also important to never compare yourself or judge others.There's always a lot that you can't see. 〰〰〰〰I love this community and I honestly feel I've gotten out just as much if not more than I put in. However, I'm personally struggling with being in this weird limbo of coming to the tail end of active treatment and trying to fully claim my life back. I've always lived my life freely and fully and now I'm hesitating. It's exhausting and the mental mindf*ck is taking its toll. With that said I'm taking a little break from social and focusing on healing as well as working on some personal projects. I can't wait to be back and more inspired than ever because what is also not pictured here is the most grateful heart of a survivor who is inspired by all of you and actively working to be the best version of herself more and more each day. I've never been a big baby person and wasn't sure if I even wanted kids pre-cancer. However there is a big difference between not wanting and not being able to. And it's moments like these that make me sad for being forced into the latter camp. When battling cancer, you try so hard to focus on the positive and everyone expects you to be so strong. However, there are moments when I am so angry that this stupid disease may've robbed me of the fundamentals of being a woman- being put on artificial menopause, carrying scars on places that should be sexy, and not being able to have biological children. These are things nobody talks about but are the deepest battle scars that nobody can see. For all my fellow warriors who are in the same boat, this post contains a hug and a vow that you aren't alone, I'm crying alongside you. There are so many things people take for granted and while I allow myself the occasional wallow- mostly, I celebrate perfect afternoons like this one, catching up with my dear friend and her beautiful, unicorn 👶 B. I guess being an Auntie is pretty cool. #bestbaby 📷:@missconnieh Trying to meld my medical world with my normal one is exhausting and sometimes I feel out of place. Kinda like this hippo in a tutu standing awkwardly on Broadway 🙃#lifeaftercancer It never seizes to amaze me the instant bond cancer survivors form. There's no discrimination of age, race, religion, appearance, class hierarchy etc. You just bond for a shared love/want for survival. Recent events have me sick and disappointed in humanity. It rots the core of what America was built upon. I find myself wanting even more to embrace awareness, celebrate difference and spread kindness.This #wcw goes to my fellow survivor @sherryowang. To the outside world, this was just a typical NYC happy hour catch up between two friends. What people didn't know was that it was our first time meeting in person (she was visiting), after both battling cancers trying to kill us. She survived 17 rounds of cold-capping + chemo/surgery and I was wearing a wig post my chemo/surgery/radiation rounds. To the rest of the world, we were just two old friends gabbing away (seriously, we talked non-stop) and the thought makes me smile. After all, we're proof that despite experiencing something so ugly, life goes on, we heal and beautiful friendships will form. Always happy to meet fellow warriors, survivors and thrivers- you'll always have a friend in the big City 🌃 💜#latergram "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." There's a fine line between respecting your battered body and pushing yourself and I tend to tow that line. If you follow my instastories on the reg, you see I like to celebrate the "little firsts, again". They are benchmarks that my body is healing, that I'm able to be "normal" again, and that one day soon I can put this awful cancer chapter behind me. This last week, I was able to go kayaking, walk 7 miles in one day, and ride a bike for 12 miles (but not all in the same day). To the normal person these are pretty easy stats but to me, these are precious firsts (again) that made me truly proud of this little body of mine. To all my fellow warriors, celebrate the little wins to normalcy, and let's raise a 🥂to many more. #ned #celebratelife #nyc #ihadcancer 📷: @inspiredbytrins When it's too late to change, and you realize otw out the door that your favorite dress (+ your #postchemo hair) now makes you look like Peter Pan cross dressing as Tinkerbell 😩🤦🏻‍♀️At least my friends will love me unconditionally 😂💕#cancerproblems #hairgrowth #help Lemme give ya'll a hump day treat🍦. I'm continuing to push the initiative in making cancer talk less taboo while raising awareness of #Her2 breast cancer. Check out my small collaboration with @livingbeyondbc now on thepinkribboneffect.com (link in bio 👆🏼). I channeled my inner #carriebradshaw (that's her street!) and gave some real talk on my personal battle as well as 🤓facts on Her2. #motivation #taboo #collaboration As much as I enjoy being back at work, I'm realizing how much I've forgotten or have pushed out of my head temporarily. It's super frustrating willing your tired brain to remember! Chemo brain definitely lingers, even if chemo is over (is it just me?!!). I feel like it takes me so much longer to digest information and I've forgotten a lot of little things that were so ingrained in me before. I'm sharing not because it makes me look good (it clearly does not) but it's just a reminder to be kind to yourself and that it's ok to ask for help and take it day by day. Overall, people understand (or do a good job pretending) and for that I am thankful. We've just been through hell and trying to escape so be grateful for the normalcy you're gaining but also remember, just because you can't or don't show your scars doesn't mean you're not still reeling from the battle. Always be kind. To others, and most importantly- to yourself. #motivationmonday Saw these hilarious ads on my morning work commute. Friendly reminder to check yourselves and #feelitonthefirst 💕Early detection is key, my friends 😘👌🏼👆🏼💪🏼#boobs
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